Memories of Feathery Wings
by esprit en deuil
Summary: This is an AU story that is set pre-series. Tony had always felt the calling to help people, so it's only natural he would turn to law enforcement after he loses everything he used to live for after his fall from grace. Angel!Tony (well fallen Angel but technically I think he can still be classified as Angel...)
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: Hiya guys, I'm back! Long time no fics... It has been a crazy year. I finally graduated and am officially a nurse, Yay!, I start a new job, working at the ER next month so freaking out and excited about that. My beta reader kinda stopped working with me but show must go on, right? So this fic is not beta read so I'm sorry for any and all mistakes, I'm still Finnish and my english is still not perfect :D . This short piece is currently all there is of this fic, but I am hoping to turn this into a multi chaptered story that may or may not turn into slash (so many ideas...) but I'm not making any promises at the moment as far as the schedule goes. But I hope you enjoy what little I have :) This is set pre-series and is definitely an AU fic. **_

Tony ran a hand through his longish brown hair before awkwardly rubbing his aching shoulders and upper back and sighing heavily. Even though it had been years it still hurt. Maybe that was the point really, to bear the marks of his own failure forever so that he would never get peace from them.

Well it could be worse he supposed. He had a job that mattered and he was healthy, it was far from the hell he deserved.

The fact that things could be worse didn't make the ache and longing go away though.

Maybe if it all hadn't been so pointless, so meaningless in the grand scheme of things. Maybe then he could feel some sense of righteousness, but as it was, he just felt that he lost it all for nothing.

Well maybe not nothing.

He had stopped something really bad from happening, just unfortunate for him he'd been on the wrong side of things to begin with and his last minute hesitation didn't change the fact that he'd been wrong and that his mistake had almost cost lives. He'd always wanted to do good, but in the end his gullibility and good faith had been his downfall.

Oh what a twisted sense of humor God must have to do this to him. Well he did deserve it, he deserved a lot worse really, the traitor that he was. But somewhere someone took pity on him and he got a second chance of sorts.

And he appreciated it, oh he did.

But he still missed what had been. What he'd lost.

His mind was running in circles, rather melancholy and sad circles that dragged him deeper into the depression he was feeling. He took a drink from the beer he was holding and grimaced at the taste. No matter how long he had time to get used to the acrid feeling of alcohol, he just didn't get what the fuss was about and he couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that humans drank it for fun.

Slumping further into the plush cushions of his worn green couch he reached back once more with his free hand to massage the space between his shoulder blades.

Sometimes he stood in front of the mirror with his back facing his reflection and his neck craned so he would be able to see the mark from where his wings once grew. The sight was ugly, though as years went by the marks did fade some.

But they would never go away, that much he was sure of.

The scars were big and jagged though no longer as angry red and black as the day his wings had been burnt so nothing was left but charred wounds where his wings used to be. It had hurt in more ways than one. It still did.

Just thinking about the agony made his insides clench and he cursed under his breath.

At one point in time he would never have even thought of letting out such profanities, but now it was all the same and he was left to wander around the earth trying to find redemption though he wasn't sure there was any for him. Maybe he was destined to go through this life and end up down in the pit once he was done leading a life of misery, trying in vain to find his way back to heaven, though he was unsure whether he would ever be done.

Some might say he was being overly dramatic, but the sad truth was that he was only being realistic.

He was a fallen angel, one that had caused his fall all by himself. He didn't have the luxury of going through life not knowing what was to come in the afterlife, no way of pretending this was all good enough.

Humans had the misguided thought that knowing would make it all easier, but knowing for sure what was at stake made everyday life that much worse since you were acutely aware of how much you had to lose while the pressure of knowing what there really was to gain might have been enough to push many over the edge.

He knew what was waiting after death. He just didn't know if he would ever get there again. He wasn't even sure he had a chance anymore or if he deserved one. As far as he knew, no angel had ever earned their wings back once they were deemed unworthy to carry them anymore.

Tony shook his head to rid himself of that thought before putting down the bottle and stretching. He'd had enough of the pity party for now, besides he needed to be ready for work in the morning. You never knew what the new day would bring and as a cop he at least had a chance to make a difference and to try and help humans.

Even though he wasn't an angel anymore he still had the empathy of one and his hands still carried a trace of his once healing touch. It was torture having the ability to feel so much of the pain others carried and not being able to help. Just another aspect of his punishment, as was that if he used what little he had left of his healing touch, he would draw physical pain on himself and still not be able to heal the person completely. It was killing him to watch the suffering the earth was filled with and not be able to do anything about it.

But it wasn't the time to dwell on that, it was time to get some rest. Tony had heard on the grapevine that their current case had gotten the interest of the big boys in DC and he wasn't looking forward to having to deal with some navy cops or FBI guys throwing their weight around and trying to take his case.

He wasn't letting this one go, he couldn't let it go. He had to right the wrong that was happening.

He had a feeling that tomorrow was going to be another rough day of working hard to try and survive. Another day of trying to forget how much he missed home and his feathery wings.

TBC...?


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: Here I am again with a new chapter! Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to write me a review for the first chapter. I'm so excited about this fic so it's good to know that other people are interested in it too. Another thing I am excited about is the fact that I was blessed with a new beta who is wonderful and I'm looking forward to working with her on this fic and hopefully more fics in the future *wink wink* so thank you to Arress for her input and her work on this chapter. **_

The squad room of the police station was bustling with activity. So many cases that needed to be solved and so many bad guys to be caught. Everyone was busy working at their desks running down leads or doing paperwork, but none of the activity registered in Tony's mind as he looked down at the pictures on his desk for the hundredth time and wished that something, anything would jump at him and help him figure out what happened. He took out all the information they had on the case and started methodically to re-evaluate it for evidence of who the perp was they were looking for.

The real perp.

He spared a glance at the picture of petty officer James Sterling who had been found dead the day before in his apartment in eastern Baltimore. The man was young and his background suggested that he was an upstanding marine who had done his best to protect and serve his country and do right by it. That's unless you looked into the evidence that suggested that he was part of a drug dealing ring and murdered two of its members in cold blood and decided to off himself when the cops got too close to him.

Tony didn't buy it. Deep down he knew without a shadow of a doubt that the man was innocent and had been murdered.

The trouble was, everyone else was convinced by the evidence including the police chief and marine officials, and so in a week the Marine would be buried in disgrace with none of the honor the marine deserved. He would be stripped of all his medals and his passing wouldn't be marked by a full military funeral, but by that of a traitor and a criminal. His memory would be tarnished and his family would have none of the peace they would have had if they could remember their loved one as the hero he was.

Not to mention the fact that you didn't get into heaven if you killed yourself. And though God would surely know the truth, Tony needed to know the man didn't fight for his country just to lose it all because of something so trivial as money and drugs.

After spending so many years struggling to cope with the cruelty and the senselessness of humans, he needed something to help him hold on to the thought that there was still some humanity and righteousness in the world. Murder was never pretty and it was always a horrible and stupid waste. He couldn't stop those things from happening any more than he could make them come undone, but he could get justice for those that had passed and lost their lives.

He looked down at the picture of the marine once more and wondered what made this particular man so special to him, why this one was so much more meaningful than all the other victims before him. It was so annoying to feel all like his spidey sense was tingling, but the connection was broken so he couldn't figure out the signal and what it meant. His brain was itching and he couldn't figure out how to scratch it.

A sudden commotion in the hall made him look up and abandon his contemplation in favor of investigating the new disturbance. He made sure he had his gun by his side and made his way to the hall with the rest of the people who had been working at their respective desks. Seeing people crowding the corridor confirmed that there was no immediate danger involved with the situation so Tony let his stance relax and took his hand off his holstered weapon, but his curiosity made him push his way through the mass of people.

"I don't care about the protocol, I want to see the man in charge of the investigation!" The man frightening the receptionist was maybe in his late forties and had a salt and pepper hair bordering on going all salt on him. The haircut suggested marine or former one and his stance was stiff, and it was obvious he was doing his best to intimidate his way into the precinct and out with whatever he wanted. By that assessment it was clear to Tony that this man was from the NCIS, and seeing as he was the only one running an investigation involving marines of any sort, it came as no surprise when he heard the timid voice of the receptionist identify him as the man to talk to. Though it came as no surprise, it still made him groan when the receptionist pointed him out and everyone turned to look at him like they expected it to be the last time they saw him with his head attached to the rest of his body.

The man turned his steely blue eyes at him and Tony could practically feel their gaze boring into him as the man made his way through the crowd that parted to let him pass.

"You in charge of the Sterling case?" The man questioned as he obviously sized up the officer standing in front of him. Tony did his own assessment and within minutes figured out that the man standing in front of him was a hard but just man with a cause, though he wasn't sure what that cause was just yet. He got the vibe that this man was honorable and essentially a good man, but it wouldn't have been the first time his instincts led him astray, so he wasn't willing to make any decisions just yet. Besides, there was something simmering just under the surface that made him weary of the man.

"Yes, I am. Anthony DiNozzo at your service." He plastered on a bright grin and extended a hand to the stranger who looked down at it sceptically, when the hand was ignored he shook the rejection off and only grinned brighter "And you are?"

"Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs, NCIS. I'm the man who is taking over the case from now on." The smug look on the man's face really rubbed Tony the wrong way, and there was no way he was going to hand the case over. He wouldn't have done that even if it didn't mean so much to him.

"Ah, then I think we have a small problem. See, I'm leading the case and I have no intention of handing the reins over to you, but if you ask nicely I might let you help me."

The startled look on the man's face was priceless and Tony could see the man pull himself even straighter and size him up again and re-evaluate the assessment he'd made earlier. He was dimly aware of the bustle picking up around them as people lost interest in the situation, and only few people stayed to see how the events would play out.

"I have jurisdiction," Gibbs asserted with confidence, as if that would win him the right to steal the case.

"We're on my turf." Tony challenged, oddly enjoying the tug-of-war.

"I have a better forensic lab at my disposal."

"I know the case inside and out, plus I have officers here who can help." Tony looked pointedly behind the other man. "As I can see you didn't bring a team with you."

When Gibbs opened his mouth to respond, Tony cut him off. He'd had enough of the game. It was time to bring in the tie breaker. "Look, you can either fight me on this and we can lose time we don't have before the real killer gets away with everything he's done, or we can agree to work together and get that son of a bitch so that a marine gets the justice he deserves. I am not letting this case go without one hell of a fight."

The words obviously surprised the other man and the two locked eyes for a long time as the agent tried to figure out if the man was telling the truth or not. Obviously he saw something in the Italian's eyes that convinced him of his seriousness, as he gave a curt nod.

"What makes you so sure Sterling didn't do it?" The question was asked in a neutral tone, but Tony let out a breath he'd been holding as he realized that the man was willing to give him a chance and hear him out. It didn't mean that he agreed with him, though.

Tony nodded his way towards one of the interview rooms at the back, and on the way there he grabbed the file from his desk that held the details of the case. The agent followed him without a word, but his raised eyebrow demanded the explanation had been be a damn good one.

Tony took a deep breath as he closed the door behind the other man and spread the contents of his file on the table in front of him.

"Ray White and Jose Santos were killed the day before yesterday in what was believed to be a drug deal gone bad. They were found in an abandoned industrial plant after a worker tipped us about suspicious activity in the area. The worker says he witnessed a man fitting Sterling's description run away from the building the bodies were found at just before he called the cops. We found no other evidence to give us a suspect, but a few hairs one of the victims had obviously grabbed from the killer during a struggle before he was killed with a shot to the chest." Tony pulled out pictures of the crime scene and spread them on the table as he told about the events.

"The hairs had no nuclear DNA in them, but our tech was able to pull mitochondrial DNA that supposedly should narrow down our list of suspects, only we weren't able to find a match in the system. Then we got an anonymous tip that a marine had been seen with our two vics the night of the murder. Convenient wasn't it? When we got to Sterling's apartment after the call it was too late." Tony laid down the picture of the scene that had greeted them when they entered the marine's apartment.

"Our ME found traces of heroin in his system and we found a stash under his bed with street value over 100,000 dollars. Our ME ruled the cause of death to be the gunshot wound to the head. He ruled the death as suicide and once his DNA came back as matching the mDNA we found at the first scene, everyone agreed that it was a case of the marine getting into the drug business and not being able to handle it, and finally killing himself when we got too close to busting him for not only selling drugs, but for the two murders as well. "

"You don't buy it." Gibbs said from his position leaning over the table, studying the pictures and the list of evidence attached to the file.

Tony shook his head "No. It's all too neat and convenient. The marine has no record of being nothing more than a law abiding citizen and honorable marine. His brother had a rep of hanging out with the wrong kind of crowd, but Sterling was always the good one. He had no tracks on his arms or other body parts except for the ones inflicted right before his death, and those looked more like bruises than needle marks, like someone had to use a lot of force to get the needle in, but the ME claimed it was because of his inexperience with drug use. Sterling also has an alibi for the time of the first murders as he was seen at a nightclub around the time of the murders, though his car was seen near the crime scene around the time the call came in. Also, even if the worker saw Sterling, why wasn't he carrying anything? Where did all the money go? What about the drugs? And who gave the tip about Sterling, and it's too much of a coincidence that the call came just around the time of his supposed suicide."

By the time he finished telling his version of events, Tony was on the verge of panting from trying to convince the other man that there was more to this case than met the eye. He was aggravated when the other man just continued to look at the file and not say anything to let him know what he thought of his take of the case. Finally, the agent seemed to have reached a decisions and he looked at the cop.

"I don't believe in coincidences." He looked down at the scattered file before collecting it all into a neat pile and picking it up. He turned to Tony and started issuing orders.

"Have the evidence sent to NCIS headquarters for my lab tech to look at it, and I've already put in orders to have the body re-examined by my ME in DC so it should be en route." He turned to walk towards the door and Tony opened his mouth to protest the apparent stealing of his case when the agent called over his shoulder. "I'm driving, if we get going now we can avoid the afternoon traffic."

Tony looked puzzled as he followed the other man out of the room and grabbed his things from his desk while the other man stood impatiently in front of it.

"And where exactly are we going?" He asked as he grabbed his cell and keys from the desk and pulled on his jacket.

"DC," Gibbs grunted as he deemed the other man ready to go before turning to the exit and trusting the other man to follow him. "I've got a case to solve and I need someone to do the grunt work, so I'm letting you tag along."

It wasn't exactly what he wanted, but Tony wasn't a fool, so he was going to take whatever he could get. He was still on the case and that was the main thing. He straightened his jacket and grabbed his wallet from his desk before hurrying after the agent. "Right behind you, Boss."

TBC...

_**I am working on the next chapter, not sure how long it'll take me to get it ready but you know what they say, patience is a virtue ;)**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: Okay so first of all I'm sorry for taking so long to post this chapter. I love my work, but it's getting in the way of my writing... Well anyways, here is chapter three for your reading pleasure. Thank you to Arress for all her work on this chapter. I'm lucky to have her as a beta :)**_

Chapter 3

When Gibbs arrived at the Baltimore Police Department, he hadn't been expecting much resistance as he walked in and took over the case, so he was more than a little surprised when this kid stood up to him and refused to let the case go. Anthony DiNozzo, Tony as he preferred to be called; Gibbs had done his research on the man running the police investigation, even though he hadn't let the other man know that. The kid was as perplexing as the case, and his gut was telling him there was more to both than met the eye. Hence the reason he'd dragged the guy back to DC with him.

Which in and of itself surprised him; he usually wasn't a bleeding heart and normally wouldn't have thought twice about stealing the case from under someone's nose. But something in the kid's eyes had convinced him that they had a common goal and that he'd have to have someone watch his back anyway, and he very much doubted the cop would just let the case go. The stubbornness was something he found both annoying and refreshing.

Even Burley had had trouble standing up to him in the beginning. And Stan had lasted with him longer than any other agent. Now with Burley gone, he was stuck with baby agents until he assembled his team back together, so Tony had been right when he pointed out that there was no team on Gibbs' back. A fact that might have helped DiNozzo's case more than it seemed.

The ride back to the NCIS was interesting and frustrating to say the least. At first he'd gotten the satisfaction of having the cop cower in his seat after each maneuver he made with the car, and he was half worried the handle above the door might not last until they made it to DC, but the kid had more guts than he would have thought, and after a while the man just closed his eyes, released his death grip and settled in his seat like he didn't have a care in the world.

The frustrating part had come after that. Who knew the man could talk so much?

Some of the chatter was case related and gave Gibbs good insight into the way things had been handled before he stepped in, but mostly what came out of the younger man's mouth was just idle talk that he had no interest in, which he tried his best to discourage. But it was obvious that no amount of sideways glances and silences on his part was going to dampen the other man's spirit.

Luckily, with his driving, it didn't take them long to get to DC and to the Yard, which finally put a pause on the talking since the cop was too busy taking in the Yard. It was like bringing a kid to the carnival for the first time; his head was swiveling this way and that trying to take everything in. Going through the metal detector seemed to be one of the more interesting rides, and Gibbs was seriously wondering if the man had ever been in a government building before. Since that was impossible for a cop, it led Gibbs to think that he might have misjudged the man and he was seriously starting to question the wisdom of bringing him along.

"So, Gibbs, what's next on the agenda?" The guy asked as he came to stand next to him with his visitor's badge hanging around his neck.

"Going to see Ducky and see what he's made of the body and then down to see Abby." He turned and made his way to the elevator, trusting that the other man would follow.

"Sounds like a plan." Tony agreed as he jogged to catch up with Gibbs. "Any chance of you telling me what is a Ducky and who is this Abby?"

Gibbs just smirked and faced the elevator doors as the other man circled to stand at his back. "You'll see."

A frustrated huff was his only answer.

Once they reached the floor Autopsy was located on, Gibbs strode through the elevator doors as soon as they opened and made his way towards the actual morgue. When he didn't hear DiNozzo following him, he turned around and prompted the other man to move his feet and follow with a glare.

"You brought me to the morgue? You keep ducks at the morgue?" The indignant muttering was ignored as the two stepped into the autopsy room where a man was standing next to the sink washing his hands. The body of the dead marine was lying on the slab, half covered with a thin sheet.

"Ah, Jethro! Your timing is as impeccable as always. Oh, and this must be the poor lad they have you working with from the Baltimore PD." The man exclaimed as he turned to his visitors. "Dr. Donald Mallard, the current medical examiner of NCIS at your service. Feel free to call me Ducky." He extended a hand to Tony, who looked at the still wet and dripping hand before looking around and finding a towel, which he used to dry the hand before shaking it.

"Anthony DiNozzo, Baltimore Police Department. Pleased to meet you." DiNozzo shot a smirk in Gibbs' direction "Donald Mallard, Ducky, I get it."

Gibbs just rolled his eyes in a 'What ya want, a medal?' look and turned his attention to the ME who was talking again.

"Yes, well, a rather unfortunate coincidence I'm afraid, a terribly-"

"Duck. You have anything on the case?"

"Oh, yes, I examined the report by the ME who performed the autopsy and have examined the body, and I must say that I am disappointed in the way the case has been handled." That perked the interest of the other two men, as did the disgust that had crept into the ME's voice. "The original investigation was right in naming the gunshot wound as the cause of death, but to rule it as suicide is ludicrous to say the least." The ME was pacing as he ranted so he didn't see the look on the other men's faces, but Gibbs saw the hope that lit in DiNozzo's eyes when the suicide theory was called into question.

"Why's that, Duck?"

Ducky whirled to look at the agent and continued in a controlled tone. "I asked Abigail to run the trajectory for me when I noticed the inconsistency with the ruling of suicide and my findings. There is no possible way that this man shot himself in the head. Furthermore, there is no way he took the drugs by choice. The markings indicate that the injections were done by force while he struggled. Even a first year medical student would be able to see that the punctures are positioned so that he couldn't have done them himself. Not to mention the fact that anyone who had that many drugs in his system wouldn't be able to hold, much less shoot, a gun. Someone drugged the poor man and then shot him."

Gibbs had been splitting his attention between DiNozzo and the ME, which is how he saw the change in the cop. There was something akin to reverence in his face, and the way he tilted his head back and closed his eyes like a peace had settled over his very soul made Gibbs' brow knit together in confusion at having the cop react with such emotion, and it seemed as if he had intruded on something personal, something more than he was allowed to witness. But as suddenly as the moment began it was over, and Gibbs was left to wonder if he had imagined the whole thing.

He turned his attention back to the ME, who was putting the body away while muttering to himself about questionable work ethics.

"Thanks, Duck," Gibbs hollered as he indicated to Tony that it was time to get going and headed out of the door.

"It was nice to meet you," The younger man called out before hurrying after the agent who was already standing by the elevator. "Now we know that Sterling didn't kill himself, but we still have no idea who did kill him. So, now we're back at the start and we have no suspects. And we have no idea how Sterling is mixed in with the other murders seeing as nothing seems to really make sense." DiNozzo was feeling frustrated as he recounted what they knew so far.

"Well, I knew there was a reason I brought you with me," Gibbs said, and at the other man's puzzled look he added, "You get to help me crack the case."

TBC...


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: I know, one of these days I'll start writing these chapters in advance so I can post faster... Anyways, thank you to Arress for the beta and thank you to everyone who has sent a review, I appreciate all the comments. Here's the next chapter, hope you enjoy: **_

The noise that filled the air as soon as the elevator doors opened was something Tony found hard to classify as music of any sort. It felt like the whole hallway was vibrating and it seemed that the pulsation was coming directly from what appeared to be some kind of lab. Unfortunately, it seemed that it was Gibbs' intention to go into said lab. Tony really wasn't cherishing the idea of following him into the nest of whatever was responsible for the noise, but he had no choice but to suck it up and follow the other man.

Once they stepped through the automatic doors, the level of noise magnified enough that it seemed to vibrate through their whole bodies, and for a second Tony was worried his heart might spontaneously stop after thinking that a pacemaker had been installed, but luckily the fear was short lived as Gibbs strode straight to the machine producing the noise and turned it down to manageable level.

The effect was instantaneous, as soon as the noise was gone a head popped up from behind the counter and glared at the men standing in the lab.

"Hey, I was listening to that!" As soon as the woman recognized one of the visitors her face changed from scowling to happy. "Gibbs! You're back from Baltimore." The woman ran to the older man and tackled him with a huge hug with her mouth going the whole time. "So how was it? Were the cops nice? They sent me a whole bunch of stuff and I went through the whole thing with the finest of tooth combs. Oh and who's this?" She finished as she pulled back and saw Tony standing next to the agent.

"Abby, this is Anthony DiNozzo, the cop who was working on the case. DiNozzo, meet Abby Sciuto. She's our lab tech extraordinaire. DiNozzo is here to help me with the investigation, so play nice. " The last part was directed at the Goth, who smiled innocently at the man.

"Nice can be overrated. It's my pleasure to meet you and you can call me Tony." DiNozzo flashed his most charming smile as he extended his hand out to the woman who looked at him suspiciously before reaching to shake his hand.

"Abby," The Goth responded shortly before turning back to Gibbs. "I didn't know you were going to bring in a stray." There was definitely a bit of bite in her tone which made Tony wary and made the grin drop from his lips. Obviously this wasn't a woman that would fall in the face of his charm.

Gibbs though wasn't in the mood to watch him trying to get into her good graces. "What have you got, Abs?"

She huffed in displeasure at having her comment ignored, but quickly recovered and took the older man by the hand and led him towards her desk.

"'What have you got?' like you even need to ask, Gibbs! You wound me! When have I ever let you down, our fearless leader?"

"Abby." The name was growled, but Tony detected affection there, too. These two were obviously close, and judging by the interaction, the relationship seemed to be purely platonic in nature.

"Fine." The Goth pouted for a second before launching into her findings. "I know you've been by to see the Duckman already, which by the way hurts me because I should have been your second stop, the first being the Caff-Pow! Machine. Anyway, so he told you our petty officer didn't kill himself and I bet he gave you his whole lecture about the lack of work morals at the PD. No offense." The last part was directed at Tony, who was unsure whether offense was meant or not.

"But I have to stand by most of the findings of the lab techs at the Baltimore PD. The mDNA results were pretty conclusive in the first case and the results match our second vic. I ran through all the evidence from that case and I still have some stuff pending, but what I did find is that the same gun was used in all the murders, so it's highly likely that the same person killed all three men. I tried getting nuclear DNA from the hairs, but even I couldn't pull that one off. So all I can say is that either Sterling was at the scene and saw something he shouldn't have, or someone he shares mDNA with was.."

This made Tony frown. "I thought DNA was unique. How can they share it? Do you mean like twins?"

Abby turned to look at him and with her best professor voice started explaining her findings. "That's nuclear DNA, which is individual and no two people share the same DNA code, except for identical twins because they're just awesome that way. mDNA, which stands for mitochondrial DNA, only narrows down the gene pool to a maternal heritage. So nDNA you get from both your parents, mDNA you only get from your mother, so siblings all share the same mitochondrial DNA, though they have their own DNA code. So we know Sterling didn't kill those two men and himself, but as I said, either he was at the first murder scene or someone he's maternally related to was. Luckily, I'm just a lowly lab tech and you guys get the big bugs and get to find out which scenario it is."

"Thanks, Abs," Gibbs said planting a kiss to her cheek and turning to exit the lab area. "DiNozzo, quit lollygagging. We have a murderer to catch!"

Tony hurried after him with a wave at the lab tech, who was already turning her music louder and dancing to the beat.

They'd been working in the bullpen for almost ten hours, doing their best to crack the case open, but nothing seemed to make sense after everything they now knew about the case. They seemed to be no closer to figuring out the murders than they had been all those hours ago.

Tony stretched his back and tipped his chair back so that his feet were resting on his borrowed desk as he contemplated everything they knew. Sterling was somehow connected to the murder of the two drug dealers, but he didn't seem to have any drug connections. Why would he have been at the first murder site? It was isolated enough that it was doubtful he got there by accident, a witness placed him there around the time of the murders, but the man had no motive.

Something was nagging at him and he could see the same feeling reflected from the older agent. Something didn't fit.

Going after a hunch he decided to call the bar the petty officer had been seen at the night of the murders. The bartender who'd worked the shift hadn't been in when the cops had been by to talk to the people there, but Tony was hoping the man was available now.

As luck would have it the man was at work and remembered Sterling from that night. His statement was another piece to the puzzle, but it didn't seem to get them any closer to the answer. That was until something Abby said came back to his mind and with that realization Tony felt energized and closer to cracking the case than he'd been the whole time. He could sense Gibbs watching him as he typed furiously on his computer before he found the information he was looking for. He looked over at the other man who was staring at him with those piercing blue eyes.

"Well, DiNozzo? You got something?"

"Remember what Abby told us about the whole DNA thing? Well, I called the bartender at the bar Sterling went to during the night of the first murder. Get this, he was looking for his brother. His brother, who happens to have prior convictions for drug related incidents. It seems that the bartender pointed him in the direction of the place he'd heard a deal might be going down that evening. Which also happens to be our first murder scene." Tony explained while grinning from ear to ear. Finally, they had a lead to follow.

"I think I would like to have a chat with this brother of his," Gibbs said while standing up and collecting his things.

"I bet you would. I have a contact in Baltimore who I told to keep an eye out in case he appears, I'll call him on the way and see if he's heard anything."

As it turned out, the guy had heard something and that something led the two men straight to the missing brother they had been searching for. In the end Tony found the whole arrest to be rather anti-climatic. No gunfire, just a short chase that ended with Tony on top of their new prime suspect and Gibbs pointing a loaded gun at the guy just to make sure he wouldn't get any more ideas of an escape.

As he watched the guys spill his guts to Gibbs in interrogation, Tony couldn't help but shake his head. As he listened to the guy admit to killing the two guys and stealing both the money and drugs and then killing his brother when he confronted him about it, he felt pity and sadness. Sterling didn't deserve to die at his brother's hand; it hadn't been his time yet. And why? Just because he cared enough about his brother to try and help him out of whatever mess he'd gotten himself into this time.

As agents led the man out of the room, he wished for a reaction. Something to show that he wished things had been different, that he hadn't killed his brother. It never came.

The man was too far gone to even regret his actions. Maybe once the drugs wore off, he would start to realize the reality of what he'd done.

Tony didn't hold out much hope. Some people just couldn't be saved.

His thoughts were interrupted when he was startled out of his revere by the sudden appearance of Gibbs by his side. The man was half ninja or something. It was rare that someone managed to creep up on Tony, and he really disliked the feeling of being snuck up on.

"The case's closed," Gibbs commented as he stood next to the other man. "Need a lift?"

Tony hadn't been expecting that, so the question took him by surprise. Gibbs didn't seem like the type to worry about the convenience of other people. On the other hand, he was tired and was not looking forward to finding a way back to Baltimore, so maybe it was best not to look a gift horse in the mouth.

"Sure, I'd appreciate that." He had been worried that Gibbs might have offered out of common courtesy and hadn't really meant what he'd said, but the approving look he got for his response alleviated that fear.

The ride was spent in comfortable silence, neither man felt the need to talk. Quite frankly, Tony was too tired and wound up to talk.

The case was closed and an innocent man had been cleared, but the pointlessness of it all weighed heavy on his mind. It was one of those things that haunted him: Lives that were wasted for no purpose. There was no great plan that called for Sterling to be killed by his brother. God didn't decide it was his time to die, neither did destiny or whatever crap people called it.

Most of the time he tried not to dwell on such pesky feelings of hopelessness, but somehow this case just got to him.

As they approached Baltimore, he couldn't help but think that it might all have to do with his wandering feet starting to itch again. Since being dropped on earth, he hadn't been able to stay put for more than few years. Something in him was urging for him to move on, and now the feeling was back.

For a second he contemplated asking Gibbs for a job, but he decided against it. He didn't want to sound needy, and it was ridiculous to think that the older man would even hire him based on one case he should have been able to solve without the help from NCIS in the first place.

Once they arrived at the Baltimore Police Station, the two men sat in the car in silence for a minute before Tony broke the silence.

"Well, it was nice working with you. Thanks for the ride." He extended his hand to the other man and waited for it to be taken in a hand shake.

For a second it looked like the other man was going to say something, but the moment passed so quickly that Tony figured that he must have imagined it.

"No problem. Was good to meet you, DiNozzo. Watch your six." Gibbs had a firm handshake and for a moment Tony felt he should say something, but again he thought better of it and instead climbed out of the car.

"You, too. Thanks again. Bye" Tony shut the door and waved goodbye to the other man before turning to head back to his own car. He turned around just in time to see the NCIS agent driving off with his tires squealing.

He felt like he'd just missed an opportunity, but in the end he shook his head and got into his car. There was no way Gibbs would have hired him so he just would have embarrassed himself. Best to not even go there; there were plenty of other opportunities. And it wasn't like he had to get out of Dodge. He had a good job and the people he worked with were great.

Maybe he could send an application to FBI.

Before he could turn on the engine there was a knock on his window and he reached for his gun before he saw a familiar figure looking at him through the window. He rolled down the window to see why Gibbs had come back.

"Listen, DiNozzo," The older man began as he pulled a card from his pocket. "I seem to find myself in need of some decent agents on my team. Call me if you need a change of scenery." With that the man handed him his card and walked away.

Tony looked down at the card and smiled. Looked like he didn't need to consider the FBI after all.

TBC...


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N: I know I know... it's been way too long since I last posted. There is a rather simple explanation for it: I seem to have misplaced my beta reader. I haven't heard from her in over a month and I finally decided that I can't keep waiting for her so I'm continuing this without a beta. There seems to be a curse that makes me lose my beta readers... So I apologize in advance for any and all mistakes in punctuation etc. I am only human and a Finnish one at that ;) Okay so here's the next chapter, it's a short one, but I promise I won't take so long to get the next one out. Hope you enjoy. **_

Tony woke up gasping and shaking with the remnants of his dream quickly vanishing into the early morning gloom, leaving behind only vague feelings and images that escaped before his mind could grasp them. He struggled up from under his rumbled sheets and rushed to the bathroom where he switched on the light and just stood in front of the vanity with his head bowed and hands braced. He slowly shook his head before washing his face to chase away what little was left of the nightmares. His face washed and dried and his feelings calmed, he took care of business before returning to his bedroom and pulling on a shirt after deciding that it was too late to go back to sleep.

The fact that it was too early to be up didn't matter, there was no way he could go back to bed.

He turned on the light in the living room and sat on the worn couch. In the bright light of the room he started thinking of the nightmare. It wasn't the first time he'd had such dreams though it had been a while since the previous one and it wasn't the first time he couldn't for the life of him remember the details of the dream. There were just images that seemed out of focus, like he was watching events unfold while underwater.

There was a mutiny of sorts, angels plotting something. Feelings of betrayal, of fear. There'd been a sense of urgency and then- nothing. It was always the same, there was a terrible sense of urgency and dread and then blinding hot, searing pain.

It was the pain that woke him up and for a second it was like he was living again the day he was thrust upon this earth.

It was the kind of confusion, pain and terror he could never forget.

He wished he could forget. The nightmares haunted him though he didn't have them as often as in the beginning. He wasn't sure if it was just a dream or if it was memories trying to push their way to surface. He knew he would never regain all the details of his fall, but it would be nice to have more pieces to the puzzle than the dreams and vague recollections. He wanted to know how he ended up being the bad guy in the story.

Maybe then he could figure out how to become good again.

Shaking his head Tony made his way to the kitchen and got himself a bottle of beer from the fridge before making his way to his living room and sitting down on the well worn couch. He took a swallow of the acrid liquid in the bottle and grimaced.

There were some things he just would never learn to appreciate.

Tony looked around his apartment and the boxes piled beside the opposite wall. It had been almost two years since he'd taken Gibbs up on his offer, moved to DC and started working at NCIS and this was his third apartment in that span of time. The job offer couldn't have come at a better time, he'd felt watched and on edge in Baltimore. It had truly been the time to move on.

So many things had changed since he was a cop in Baltimore, a new city, new job new apartment. Everything felt strange and he felt unsettled, though he didn't feel like his life was as empty as it had once been. The first weeks in DC had been rough, he'd had to go through some training to actually qualify as an NCIS agent and then he'd had to deal with people harassing the rookie. Gibbs had done what he could to help, but there was this weird suspicion in the older man's eyes that hadn't lifted until months had gone by and he'd proven he could pass muster.

It hadn't helped either that every time he'd gotten sent down to the lab to see Abby, the goth had given him the cold shoulder. It wasn't until week three that she started to warm up to him and by week four they were friends. He didn't even know how it happened, but he'd learned not to question it when things went the way he wanted. Besides in the end Abby had become a much needed friend in a city where he didn't know anyone, the goth helped him with finding the good places to shop and helped him find a new apartment after she found out just what kind of rathole he'd been living in. She didn't need to know that he'd moved to a new rathole when it became apparent that he couldn't afford the new place she'd helped him find.

Ducky had also been a big help in adjusting to the new job. The older man had been around longer than most and knew all the little tools of the trade. He always had a story for every situation and Tony could always count on him being there to help bounce ideas or just to help him whenever Gibbs got too demanding or the second B got to be too much.

And what about Gibbs.

Tony had never met anyone like the ex-marine. He was hard as nails and could make any man cower with his piercing stare, his blue eyes a weapon that bore straight into your soul. On more than one occasion he was sure those eyes missed nothing and could see straight into his very core and see the deceit that festered within. Those moments when the older man just looked at him in a measuring, searching way, made him question if he wasn't doing good enough job of hiding himself and so he would unleash the inner idiot frat boy and though the gaze still lingered, the moment passed without the other man being non the wiser about his true self.

Although he'd known Gibbs for only two years, there had been times he'd wondered what it would be like to trust the other man with his deepest secrets. The man had integrity and though he was a hard nosed marine, he was loyal and caring. He may not seem the warm and fuzzy type, but he had the ability to be just that.

There was just something he couldn't quite grasp that made him weary of the other man. There was something hidden beneath the surface. The man was as closed mouthed as man could be and very rarely talked about his personal life. He'd been by the older man's house a few times and the place was homey on the outside but the big house seemed rather empty and lonely. There were pieces of the puzzle missing and though Tony trusted the other man with his life on the job, he wasn't sure if that carried into his personal life.

Tony took another drink from the beer and looked at the clock. In four hours he'd have to start getting ready to go back to work. They'd just closed a case the previous night and Gibbs had told him and the other agent on the team to go get some sleep before coming back to finish the paperwork.

The other agent, the new agent. Miss Caitlin Todd, Kate to her friends and co-workers. She was a profiler who thought the world was her oyster and Tony someone who was trying to get a free sample of it. He wasn't sure why he seemed to rub the woman the wrong way, but she tried to one up him on every occasion she got. To be fair he did his best to respond in kind, but still.

And the way she belittled him at every turn was getting annoying, just because he hadn't been a secret service agent and protected the president of the USA didn't mean he was an idiot or incompetent as an agent. He wondered what little miss perfect would think if she ever found out that he wasn't just some beat cop from Baltimore. He probably didn't live up to her idea of an angel, the Catholic girl in her would freak out if she found out that the person she'd been picking on was an angel. Or then she'd get another reason to dislike him, a fallen angel and all that, technically he wasn't even sure if he was an angel anymore.

Deciding that it was futile to go back to bed anymore, Tony ditched the beer and went to change into his running gear. Running was his tried and true method of keeping the demons at bay, well the ones in his mind at least. And besides, running would help him get into the right mindset for the day at the office. The case had been a hard one and reliving it while writing the report wouldn't be easy.

Grabbing his keys and cell, Tony switched off the lights and made his way out of the apartment. He made sure his cell was on in case anyone needed to contact him before starting out in a jog. It was just starting to drizzle and by the time he finished his run and made it back home he was soaked to the skin and the rain showed no signs of stopping.

Looking at the clock Tony realized that he had just enough time to take a shower and grab a coffee before he'd head to the office. Getting in early would give him a chance to get a head start on the paperwork, it wasn't like he didn't practically live at the office anyway, with a new agent joining the team he had to be on top of his game and a few extra hours would give him the head start he needed.

It would be nice to have more in his life than just work, but it was all good. He liked helping people, making a difference. And now in DC he felt that his life had more meaning than it ever did in the previous places he lived in, now he had people he really cared about and he felt a weird sense of belonging.

He could get used to the feeling. He was already starting to do so.

It scared him more than he wanted to admit.

TBC...


	6. Chapter 6

The run helped Tony get his thoughts back on track and by the time he got to the office and finished his paperwork from the previous case, he felt like a human being again. Even Kate arriving and making comments about him trying to suck up by arriving early didn't make his good mood vanish.

All in all it was shaping up to be a decent day.

By lunch time they'd managed to lay the previous case to rest and were trying to do a dent in the sizable mountain of cold cases that were collecting dust in the archives. The only problem with those case files were that there was a reason the original investigators hadn't cracked them. It was frustrating to have a case and not be able to take it anywhere, the petty cases weren't so bad, but a murder that was never unsolved meant that a killer had gotten away with what they did.

The thought didn't sit right with any decent investigator.

"This is so annoying!" Kate huffed out in frustration as she dropped down the case file she'd been reading. "This is impossible, there isn't supposed to be such things as a perfect crime so why can't we solve these?"

Tony looked up from the file he'd been studying and couldn't help but agree with the sentiment. Not being able to do anything to get justice for the people who had been wronged was a feeling he never got used to. Before he could voice his thoughts his desk phone rang, giving him an excuse to leave the depressing though of yet another crime going unsolved, at least for the time being.

"Very special agent Anthony DiNozzo, how may I be of service?" He answered with his best flirty voice making Kate roll her eyes in disgust.

"Oh hi, Abs!- Sure I'll be right down." He responded after hearing who was on the other end of the line, he hung up the phone and headed for the elevators. "Going down to see Abby!" he called out to both Kate and Gibbs, who was just getting off the elevator with what was probably his tenth coffee of the day.

Tony liked going down to Abby's lab, he'd gotten used to her music so that it didn't hurt his ears anymore and her bubbly personality always seemed to cheer him. Just the sight of her on most days would bring a smile to his lips and today was no different.

"What's up Abs?" He called out over the noise and braced himself for the tackle that was about to happen.

"Tony!" The tackle that followed was just as fierce and tight as he'd expected and he couldn't help but chuckle as he hugged her back. Sometimes he wondered if his craving for human contact was normal or a result of his unique circumstance.

"So, what's the reason you dragged me down here? Want to have your wicked way with me on your break?" Tony asked while wiggling his eyebrows.

"You wish!" Abby responded with a giggle before going to her desk. "You know the evidence you wanted me to go over again from the cold case that was bugging you? Well I ran it, twice, but there's nothing the original tech missed." The disappointed look on her face told Tony how much she wanted to find something the original investigators missed.

"So, you called me down to tell me you have nothing for me?" Tony hedged a little perplexed as to why he'd been called down.

"Well kinda." Abby admitted before trying to look busy with her babies.

"Well thanks Abs, but you do know you could have told me this over the phone right? I'm not as technologically challenged as the bossman."

"And miss out on one of the patented Tony hugs? Never! How crazy do you think I am, you have the warmest and bestest hugs!" Abby declared as she latched onto the agent once again and gave him a squeeze, causing him to laugh out loud.

"Well it's always nice to be appreciated." Tony tried to untangle himself from the hug when his cell started to ring, but Abby just tightened her hold so he just sighed and dug out his phone.

"Yeah Boss?... Okay I'll be right there." He responded curtly to the caller before stepping back as the goth released her hold on him.

"You know what that means, duty calls."

"You guys be careful!" Abby called after him as he turned to walk out the lab.

Tony turned back to her and dropped a kiss onto her head before mock saluting her and leaving with a quick "Always are Abs."

He headed back to the bullpen and arrived just as Kate and Gibbs were getting ready to head out.

"So what've we got?" He asked as he went to his own desk to gear up.

"Wilson's team needs us to go pick up the suspect on their murder case while they're on a wild goose chase in Baltimore" Gibbs responded with a roll of his eyes that indicated what he though of their work on the case. "Kate will fill us in on the details on the way there."

Tony nodded as he followed his teammates to the elevators. "On your six, boss."

TBC..

**_A/N: Just a short one for now, but the next chapter is almost done so I'm trying to get it up sometime next week. _**


	7. Chapter 7

**_A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who read and reviewed chapter 6! You guys are the reason I keep writing this fic. And to Checkerz all I can say is: You know what they say... patience is a virtue ;) _**

Getting to the suspects house hadn't taken them long but the drive had given them enough time to devise a plan of attack. Gibbs was going to take Kate with him via the front door and see if the man would come to the door while Tony would circle back and make sure the guy wouldn't escape through the back entrance.

When it became obvious that the man wasn't going to open the door and there was no sign of him the agents picked the locks and made their way inside, clearing the house one room at a time with Gibbs and Kate starting from the bottom floor and Tony making his way upstairs.

At the sound of yelling coming from the second floor, Gibbs made his way to the entrance hall and his heart skipped a beat as he watched his second in command fighting off the marine they had been searching. Before he could intervene, the guy shoved Tony hard enough to make him lose his balance and plummet down the stairs. There was nothing he could do but to ran past his downed agent with Kate on his heels as they tried to catch the man who was doing his best to avoid being captured.

By the time he and Kate had the perp in cuffs and Gibbs could spare the time to go and check on his agent, Tony was luckily already sitting up and shaking his head in an effort to clear it.

The way his arm had hung limp by his side and blood dripped down his face had been enough of an invitation to call and ambulance on the scene even if the fall itself hadn't been big enough to guarantee that.

Now that the perp was safely on his way to NCIS with Todd and another agent that had come from the headquarters to escort their guy back, he could get to the ambulance to see how his agent was doing.

What he heard as he approached the vehicle was nothing new so he stood outside the open doors and waited for the scene to unfold.

Tony was sitting on the gurney with his left arm secured by a sling and a small gauze on his forehead from what must have been a minor cut.

"I'm telling you guys, I'm not going to the hospital so you're just waisting your efforts trying to convince me." Gibbs had to shake his head at his stubborn agent's words. The boy never knew what was good for him.

"Sir, you twisted your shoulder on the way down the stairs and banged your ribs and you have a minor concussion not to mention a cut that might need stitches. We need to take you to the er and have a doctor do a full examination to make sure there's no nerve damage or breaks." The paramedic made a solid case, but he had no idea how stubborn the other man was.

"See." Tony said and Gibbs watched as he wiggled his fingers and with a grimace moved the bound arm as much as the sling allowed. "I can move my fingers and move the arm so I highly doubt there's any nerve damage,breaks or pinched muscles. And if you check my records you'll see a note there that I should be taken to the hospital only in a case of an emergency. This doesn't count as an emergency in my book." The look of triumph was short lived as the EMT's still looked unconvinced.

Finally one of the men sighed and nodded his head reluctantly. "Fine, I can't release you just yet, but I'll consult the doc at the hospital and see that he thinks. But that still doesn't solve the problem of you needing supervision for the next 24hours because of the concussion. Even if the doc says you can go, you'll need to be with someone and as I understand it you live alone."

Before Tony could make up a lie to weasel his way out of the concussion watch, Gibbs spoke up from his position. "He can come home with me. I have a spare room and I'd like my team to be in top from so I have an interest in his health." Before the medic could protest he added "and I'll make sure to bring him in if he has any complications. I also know a doctor who's more than willing to make a house call if necessary." That seemed to satisfy the man who nodded and with an order to his partner to keep an eye on their patient, went to call the doctor.

Gibbs turned his attention back to his agent, who was looking at him with a contemplative expression.

"What?"

"Nothing, just you don't need to offer to put up with me. I'll have you know that I would find no trouble finding someone to stay with me." The younger man huffed with a hint of frustration.

"Well yeah DiNozzo, but the point is to take care of your well being and the women you drag home aren't exactly the type to play nurse." That caused a blush to form on the other man's cheeks and Gibbs wondered what drugs had they already given him to make him embarrass so easily. Getting your shoulder repositioned was no picnic so he was sure some pain meds were coursing through his agent.

They waited in silence for the verdict and once the other paramedic came back and taped the head wound that had stopped bleeding before reluctantly releasing their patient with strict instructions that he had Tony repeat, much to Gibbs' amusement, they were on their way back to the NCIS headquarters.

"So, wanna tell me why you wouldn't go to the hospital?" As Tony ignored the question he ventured "You might as well tell me since you know I'll find out eventually."

"Just don't like hospitals." Tony answered shortly as he stared out the window at the passing cars and buildings.

"Not sure anyone really likes hospitals" Gibbs muttered in response to the non answer. He thought back to the one time he'd seen the other man in a hospital.

_Tony was lying on the gurney in the er with his eyes squeezed tightly shut and his fingers curling into fists every now and then before uncurling again in a minute. _

"_Can I go home now?" The plaintive note in the request was ignored as Gibbs looked beyond the curtains and waited for the doctor to come and examine his agent so they would know the extent of his injuries. _

"_Please Boss." The genuine pain and distress surprised him enough so that he turned and made his way over to his second and looked him in the eyes that had now opened to regard him seriously. _

"_You're getting checked out by a doctor. You have at least a concussion and I wouldn't be surprised if your've got some broken bones, so going home is not really an option right now." He hated the look of devastation that crossed the other man's face, but he had to be firm. The paramedics had already given Tony something for the pain, but there were still lines around his eyes from pain and his mouth was squeezed into a thin line. _

"_Boss.. I can't take it. Please get me out of here." The words came out as a soft plead and Gibbs really looked at the other man and only then noticed the shine of tears in his eyes. Now he was getting really worried. He noticed the man on the bed winching with every sound they heard around them and he nodded his head in sympathy. _

"_I'll go find you a doctor." _

_By the time he got back with the doctor in tow, Tony had passed out from, what he assumed was, the drugs or pain or combination of the two._

The memory made something in Gibbs' head click and he glanced at his passenger. "I know why you don't want to go back there." He noticed the other man tense at his words and then forcefully relax.

"Oh?" The question was said nonchalantly, but Gibbs sensed the tension in it.

"Yeah, you're one of the most compassionate and empathic people I've ever met and I should have realized how strongly it would affect you to be surrounded by people who are hurting, not to mention reading from your file that both your mother died in a hospital."

The snort that met his observation surprised him but he was willing to blame it on the medications.

"Empathic.. that's one way of putting it." Tony muttered but Gibbs could see that he obviously relaxed.

The rest of the ride was spent in silence as Tony pretended to sleep while Gibbs tried to ignore the weird feeling in his gut. He hated feeling like he was missing something, especially when it came to the people he cared most about, and no matter how hard he was on DiNozzo, he cared about the younger man. He just wished the other man would let him in and show him the man behind the masks.

He was glad that he'd been able to get the other man to relax with his explanation, but he was far for satisfied. It was true that Tony was one of the most compassionate people he knew but he also knew something was going on with the man. And he was going to find out what it was.

TBC...


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N: Sorry about the long wait. Here's the next chapter, Thank you to everyone who read and reviewed the previous chapter, as we all know: reviews are love :D Still no beta, so all mistakes are mine, but I hope you enjoy. **_

Tony may have been able to talk himself out of going to a hospital, but as soon as they arrived at NCIS, Gibbs dragged him down to see Ducky to make sure that he was really okay to avoid being admitted for observation.

"Of for heavens sake, what on earth were the medics thinking? releasing their patient without any regard to the concussion you surely have and the possibility of internal injuries due to the fall not to mention the fact that you injured your shoulder and might have fractured ribs. You are lucky that I have the equipment to conduct a proper examination or I would have Jethro drag you straight to the nearest ER"The clucking by the ME was obviously amusing to Gibbs, but Tony really wasn't in the mood to listen to the lecture as his head was hurting as was his shoulder. He was also pretty sure there was a sizable bruise forming on his side that was throbbing in time with his shoulder.

"I'll be upstairs in interrogation. Call me when you're done with this one and I'll be down to hear the verdict." Gibbs gave Tony a look that told him to do what the doctor told him before looking at Ducky for confirmation and upon getting a nod, headed upstairs.

"Look Ducky I'm fine. It's just a minor concussion and the shoulder feels better already so you don't really need to bother with checking me over. I can just head upstairs and work on my report." As he moved to get up from his perched position on the autopsy table, the other man moved to block his descent with a hand on his shoulder.

"Not so fast lad. You can not talk yourself out of having me take a look at you, furthermore I will take a thorax x-ray as well as one of your shoulder and you will let me do so with no objections." As the younger man opened his mouth to protest the ME raised an eyebrow.

"What did I say about objecting?" He inquired, causing Tony's mouth to snap shut. "Splendid. Let's get started then shall we? Please remove your sling and shirt and lie down."

Tony felt self conscious as he carefully stripped his torso and lay down on the cold metal table, though the other man had kindly covered it with a sheet, the cold still seemed to seep into his back.

"Did you know that radiography was actually invented in Germany in 1895 by Wilhelm Röntgen? It's rather fascinating piece of technology that makes practicing medicine more precise and leaves us with less uncertainty." Tony let the words wash over him without really paying attention to them. Once the x-rays were done along with the physical examination, Tony turned his back to the other man as he sat up and reached for his shirt. It was only then that he realized that he'd forgotten about the scars on his back. He prayed that the other man had been too busy to notice, but that hope was dashed as Ducky stepped closer to him and gently lifted his shirt to see the scars between his shoulder blades.

"What are these scars from? I can't recall you ever telling me about them before and judging by the look of them they must be quite old. They look rather like deep burns that didn't have a chance to heal properly."

Tony pulled the shirt back down and turned to face the other man. "It's nothing, just like you said, a couple of small burns that I got a long time ago. Nothing to worry about anymore so just leave it." Something flashed in his eyes that made the ME take a step back. Tony he tried to give the ME his best reassuring smile to cover up his slip. He knew he couldn't hide the defensiveness, he just wished the other man would let it go.

He let out a relieved sigh as Ducky nodded his head in understanding, though from the way the man opened his mouth he knew the subject was far from closed..

It was then that Gibbs walked through the autopsy doors, effectively interrupting their moment and Tony realized that he'd been down with Ducky for close to an hour. He was just glad that the man hadn't walked in five minutes earlier.

"So what do you say Duck?" Gibbs asked as he moved to stand next to his sitting agent.

"Well" Ducky began as he helped Tony back into his sling. "I'm still not happy about Anthony not going to the hospital, but there are no breaks and no nerve damage as far as I can tell. He does have a concussion and he needs to keep that arm in a sling for at least a week to allow his shoulder enough time to heal. He also has several bruises on his torso so I'm sure he's going to feel stiff tomorrow." He turned his attention to the older agent and added "And he shouldn't be alone for the next 24hours."

"Concussion watch" Gibbs clarified with a nod "Not a problem, DiNozzo can get better acquainted with my guest bedroom."

Satisfied with the answer, Ducky gave Gibbs a few more advices on what to look out for and handed him a prescription for painkillers and muscle relaxants before releasing the men.

"So back to work?" Tony asked the boss as they stepped into the elevator. He just wanted to forget about his slip in the autopsy and for things to go back to what qualified as normal in his life.

"Desk duty, type your report on today and I think with your new handicap, by the time you're done we can call it a day." Gibbs responded referring to the sling that restricted his movements.

"Oh you mean this?" Tony gestured to his sling "It's nothing, as soon as we're upstairs I'll hide it in my drawer and be back in action." Tony gave a confident grin to highlight just how fine he was. As the elevator came to a halt and the doors slid open, he started to pull the sling over his head while following the other man into the bullpen but was halted by Gibbs' voice. "You even think about it and I'll head slap you so hard that your ancestors will feel it, concussed or not."

Tony narrowed his eyes at the older man's retreating back and let out a dramatic sigh, but stopped fiddling with the sling. He got behind his desk and started typing his report with one hand. The grin Kate shot him as he struggled to write his report didn't make him feel any better about his situation. He couldn't wait for the day to be over.

That was until the day actually was over and he realized that he was going home with his boss. The idea of being alone with the older man was usually an appealing one since he liked hanging out with him, but he'd already compromised himself enough for one day and though he trusted Gibbs to have his back, this was the one thing he couldn't back him with. He was afraid of being under the influence of the painkillers and being in a close proximity with the other man, but it seemed that he wasn't going to let Tony get away with going home alone.

Admitting defeat, Tony followed the other man to his car and they spent the ride in comfortable silence.

The evening passed quickly and to Tony's surprise the other man wasn't as overbearing as he would have thought. He did make sure the younger man ate and took his pills, and growled at him at times to make sure he followed doctor's orders. But otherwise he was left to his own devices.

Gibbs spent most of the evening in the basement with his boat, which gave Tony an opportunity to explore the house. It didn't surprise him that the older man would have a boat in his basement as building things seemed to fit his character, he just couldn't help but wonder how the heck the thing was going to come out of the small space. He decided that once he was feeling more like himself, he'd except Gibbs' invitation to join him down in his sanctuary and he would figure out the answer to the mystery.

For now though, he busied himself with nosing around the rest of the house. The whole house had a homey feel to it and it was clear that most of the furniture where hand made and sturdy. Running a hand along the bookshelf Tony couldn't help but wonder if Gibbs had build it himself or maybe it was whoever had taught the older man to build things.

Tony wondered onto the second floor and sneaked a peek into the older man's bedroom, but before he could venture in, the man in question appeared at the bottom of the stairs to call him for dinner, effectively interrupting his exploration. Deciding to continue another time, the younger man joined his host for dinner, which the two ate in silence. He had barely finished eating when the painmeds the older man force fed him started to kick in.

"I think it's someone's bedtime" Gibbs teased with a smirk as Tony's eyelids started drooping and with some grumbling, Tony took the suggestion and let the other man lead him to the guest bedroom and to his surprise he found himself tucked in. As Gibbs wished him good night and shut the light, the Italian was left to wonder about the uncharacteristic niceness of the other man. Before he could get too deep in his contemplation, sleep tucked at him and he let himself drift off to sleep.

TBC...


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N: Chapter 9 is here! Yay! I'm trying my best to get the next chapter done and dusted so I can post it sometime next week. But here's this chappie first, hope you guys enjoy :)**_

Tony woke up gasping for breath and sweat dripping from his brow and stinging his eyes. For a moment he was confused about his surroundings before memory supplied him with a explanation on where he was. _Right you got yourself injured and you boss had to drag you home with him to keep an eye on you. Nice going. _He had tried to fight the other man about not needing a babysitter, but somehow he'd still ended up in Gibbs' car and settling into his guest bedroom.

The other thing he had fought the man on had been the painkillers and muscle relaxants that Ducky had sent him home with, but as he'd feared the older agent was a crafty bastard and had slipped the meds somewhere in his supper. He wasn't sure how he'd managed it, but the fuzzy feeling in his head told him he had definitely been drugged.

He wasn't sure how to feel about that.

What he did know was that he needed to use the bathroom. He looked at the clock on the bedside table and saw that it was only approaching midnight. He wasn't exactly sure how he'd ended up from the couch in the living room into the bed, but that was something he wasn't going to waste time thinking about. He noticed that his sling was still on and had been fortified with duct tape. He huffed out a laugh at the obvious lack of trust his boss had in his ability to take care of himself.

He carefully got out of bed and was glad to realize that he felt much steadier on his feet than he'd thought he would. He made his way to the bathroom and turned on the light before taking care of business.

He took some time to wash his good hand and splash water on his face to clear his head a bit before reaching for the towel. From the corner of his eye he saw a glint of light and he quickly turned his head towards the mirror to see what it was, but he didn't see anything out of the ordinary. He thought back to the day and remembered how he'd screwed up in autopsy so that Ducky had seen his scars, he'd always been so careful not to let anyone see them.

Making sure that Gibbs wasn't near he took off his sling and carefully removed his shirt and turned his back to the mirror so that he could take a look at the ragged marks on his back. For a minute he just stared at the marks he knew so well but after a while he noticed something strange about the scars. He knew the marks by heart and he could have sworn they were more healed than what they seemed now, not only were the marks redder than they had been for a long time, there was a kind of rippling in the muscles covered by the marks.

He watched, transfixed, as his muscles clenched under the scars and for a second a memory of his wings surfaced in his mind. A gasp broke from his mouth as pain seared through his back and head as it felt like someone was pushing a knife out from between his shoulder blades, but as quickly as the feeling started it ended, leaving him kneeling on the floor and gasping for breath, wondering how he got down onto the floor in the first place.

A sound from the door roused him and for the second time that day he cursed the painmeds that made him let his guard down in a way that he normally never did. As he turned to look at the man by the door he saw shock and amazement on his face before all expression was shut off from it.

Obviously the man had seen something, though he had no idea what that was.

Before he could say anything the other man turned on his heel and disappeared from view, leaving behind a bewildered Tony who couldn't help but wonder what just happened.

…...

Downstairs in the basement Gibbs took a long drink from his bourbon before putting the bottle on the workbench. He'd gone upstairs to check up on his charge when he'd heard movement upstairs. He had expected to find his agent in the bathroom, even seeing him staring at himself from the mirror, transfixed, hadn't been all that surprising. The thing that first grabbed his attention were the scars he could see on the reflection of his second's back.

He grabbed the bottle and took another drink from it.

He'd been expecting Tony to snap out of his mesmerized state but then he'd seen the shakes that seemed to rock his whole body, before he could step forward to support his agent, as he feared he could collapse, those _things_ appeared.

He didn't know how to describe the shadows that seemed to grow from his second's back.

Wings.

He shook his head at his own foolishness. He was probably just hallucinating, or going crazy. Yeah going crazy seemed like a likely explanation.

He grabbed a sander block from his workbench and moved to his boat. He needed something for his hands to do, his mind was screaming at him something he wasn't wiling to examine further so he needed the distraction.

"Can I come down?" The voice startled him as did the quiet, resigned quality of it. He curtly nodded his head. He wasn't sure how to deal with his agent and how to feel about him at the moment, but he just couldn't shut the man out completely so he allowed him to enter his sanctuary.

Tony took a seat at the bottom step and Gibbs continued his quiet work on the boat for a while before he had to voice one of the questions swirling in his head. He was an investigator so not finding out the answers didn't fit his character.

"Was it real?" He spied the other man from the corner of his eye and saw how visibly startled Tony was at the question. He looked at the man closely, noticing the shadows under his eyes and the distinctive lack of the sling that was supposed to be supporting his arm.

"Depends on what you saw. To be honest I'm not really sure what happened up there..." Tony admitted sheepishly.

The words seemed honest so Gibbs looked at the man sitting on the stairs. There was fear and apprehension on his face but the older man also saw genuine puzzlement in his expression.

"I saw you-" Gibbs began not really knowing how to put into words what he'd seen. "You had wings DiNozzo." As he forced out the words he could see the wonder and shock that filled the other man's whole face. "What are you?" he added as an afterthought as he realized that what he'd seen really happened.

"What? Wings?" Tony was shaking his head and stood up to pace the floor of the basement. "It's not possible."

"DiNozzo-" Gibbs started, only to be cut off by a frantic DiNozzo "No, No! You don't understand. I don't have wings, I can't have wings! Not anymore, somethings not right. I fell!" He was pacing the floor and his hands were squeezing into fists before relaxing again.

Gibbs tried to make sense of the rant, but he was at a loss for words and for a moment he wondered if he should call Duck. Maybe the older man had some experience with things like this, but he quickly thought better of it. He listened to the other man and realized that he was loosing it right in front of him. He quickly moved to intercept his agent and halted his agitated pacing with a firm grip on his shoulders.

"Easy DiNozzo." In the face of the other man's panic, he realized that he'd calmed down enough to be able to try and calm the other man down "Tony, look at me. Tell me what's going on?" As agonized brown eyes met his, Gibbs couldn't help but feel concern for the man and he knew without a shadow of a doubt that no matter what the answer was, he'd do his best to help and protect Tony.

"I can't tell you. You'd never believe me! I hardly believe it sometimes." Tony was shaking his head and struggled out of the hold.

The younger man moved back to the stairs and collapsed to sit on them once more. Satisfied that the other man had calmed down enough to not bolt, Gibbs moved back to his boat and took out his chisel and a hammer and set to work, instinctively knowing that if he wanted answers he needed to give the other man some space.

After a long silence Tony spoke up from his position on the step. "I'm not sure I can tell you without you either not believing me or judging me. I've never told anyone what I'm rather okay with people not knowing. "

"Not my place to judge you DiNozzo, but you know as well as I do that I can't just drop this. I want to help you Tony." The words made Tony sigh and for a moment Gibbs was sure the man would walk out and he'd never see him again, but to his surprise that didn't happen.

"That's what I was afraid you'd say." After a moment of hesitation Gibbs heard an audible gulp coming from the direction of the other man and he tried to prepare himself for the revelation that was about to come, but nothing could have prepared him for Tony to softly admit

"I'm an angel." As the other man didn't say anything Tony hurried to explain "I mean not a real one, well yes real one but not a proper one anymore. See I fell. I'm a fallen angel as you might say..."

Gibbs' first reaction to the explanation was to accuse the other man of being crazy and he couldn't believe what he'd just been told. His second was to accidentally cut himself with the chisel.

As he took a rag to hold over the cut on his hand, he heard the other man coming over to him. He was about to tell the man to get away from him, but instead he just watched in fascination as Tony took his hand in both of his and closed his eyes in concentration.

For a second they just stood there and as Gibbs was going to pull his hand away, he felt a warmth spreading into his hand and his eyes widened as he saw the cut slowly healing until finally there was just a small scar where the cut used to be.

"See, saved you a trip to the hospital." Tony said with a smirk before his legs buckled form under him. Only quick reflexes from Gibbs stopped him from hitting the floor hard as the older man slowly lowered him to sit on the cold floor.

"Might be you that needs the hospital." Gibbs said as he tried to wrap his head around everything that had happened in the past 24hours.

"Nah, just need to rest for a bit. One of the drawbacks of being a _fallen_ angel is that all the cool angel powers that I still have are messed up and come with a price now. Healing a small cut like that kinda drains me. I once turned a life threatening wound to a serious one and I was in a coma for three days."

"You alright now?" Gibbs asked as he helped the younger man move from the floor to sit on the stairs. The way his second's hands shook and he looked paler than he'd been before made him worry about the man. _Angel_. He shook his head to clear it as the concept still seemed too ridiculous to understand.

"Fine. Just kinda wish I could lie down." Tony answered as he rested his head in his hands and tried to stop the room from spinning.

"C'mon, let's get you upstairs." Gibbs said as he helped his second to his feet. A grimace from the younger man made him aware that he'd tried to support him by his hurt arm, so with an apologetic look he moved onto the other side and draped Tony's good arm over his shoulders and supported the man upstairs and helped him settle on the couch.

He felt unnerved in a way he had never felt before and didn't really know what to do with himself, so he just took a seat in the armchair next to the couch and looked at his agent.

"So-" Tony started, unsure how to proceed with the conversation they obviously needed to have. "I guess you have some questions."

Gibbs puzzled over the statement for a moment. "What did you mean when you said you're a fallen angel?"

"Wow, straight to the hard stuff." Tony said as he closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. He couldn't look at the other man so he kept his eyes on the ceiling. "I don't really know what to tell you. I can't remember much about being an angel, just the unbelievable pain of not being one anymore."

"If you can't remember, then how do you know how to heal and if you really are an angel?" Gibbs hadn't mean to sounds so doubtful but from the way Tony stiffened, he guessed the words didn't come out right.

"Having your wings burnt from your back and falling from heaven isn't exactly something you imagine! If you want, I can show you the scars again just so you can make sure they're real." The resentment and pain leaked into his words as he sat up and looked angrily at the other man.

"Okay, I get it. I wasn't trying to imply that you're lying or crazy."

"It's fine, I know how crazy it all sounds. Actually when I first found myself on earth, I was a mess. I had no idea who I was or what I was. It took me sometime to gain even some kind of memory of what happened. It wasn't until I met this guy, Henry, that I started to understand things. He's kind of a male version of Abby and he's into all things supernatural and helped me find out things about angels. The rest I kinda came by accidentally and I've been having these dreams about things, before.. you know. " Tony finished his explanation, wondering if any of it made sense to the other man.

It was true that most of his knowledge of facts about angels came from Henry, who also helped him create a life for himself. He never figured out how the other man knew so much about all things supernatural, but he appreciated the help at the time too much to question it. Later he started getting glimpses and snippets of his life as an angel but he never could remember exactly what happened to get him thrown out of heaven, just vague images that most of the time made no sense.

There was silence for a long time as Gibbs tried to process what he'd been told. After a while he hazarded another question.

"So what about all the women?"

Tony was at first startled by the question but then couldn't help but laugh. "That's what you want to know? Seriously?"

The other man shrugged his shoulders. "Seemed like a valid question, I always pictured angels being more...reserved."

The sheepish look on the other man's face puzzled Gibbs as he waited for an answer.

"Ah, turns out that angels aren't exactly sexual beings and after becoming human I was getting a lot of flack about never going out with anyone. So I started making up stories and I guess I kinda went a bit overboard."

Gibbs couldn't help but smile at that. He knew that most of the stories the other man told were just that, but the way the other man told him about being a fallen angel made it seem almost normal.

Noticing the drooping eyelids of the other man, Gibbs decided to cut their q and a session short.

"It's late, You should be in bed. We can continue this in the morning." He made a mental note to leave a voice message to both the director and Kate to let them know that they wouldn't be in the next morning.

"I'm sure you have more questions." Tony protested halfheartedly as the older man helped him up from the couch.

"It'll keep." Gibbs assured him as he helped the other man upstairs and into bed. "We'll talk more in the morning" by the time he got the other man into the guest bed, he was already ready to drop and offered no more objections.

Once he'd made sure everything was fine with his guest, Gibbs decided to try and get some sleep himself. Too many thoughts were circling around in his head. Maybe everything would be clearer in the morning.

He snorted at his own optimism.

TBC...


	10. Chapter 10

Gibbs busied himself with making breakfast for himself and his house guest. As he flipped a pancake to keep it from becoming too dark, he thought of the events of the previous night. It seemed like a dream, but as he looked down at the scar on his hand he couldn't help but believe.

He'd been wondering how to deal with his second in command now that he knew his secret, but the more he thought about it the less confident he was.

He took the pancake out of the pan and replaced it with fresh batter as he thought of how much he still had to learn about the younger man and he had many questions about his.. unique situation. He was kicking himself for not realizing just how much of himself the other man was hiding and in a way he was upset at DiNozzo for not confiding in him earlier. He understood the need for secrecy and how hard it was to share something like this, but there was a small irrational part of his brain that still felt cheated in a way.

A part of him couldn't wrap his head around the fact that his second had once been an angel and had somehow fallen from grace, something that he'd always thought of being the result of an ultimate sin. He just couldn't negotiate his second in command as being someone who would do sin so grave that it would get him expelled from heaven.

But still a bigger part of him trusted the man, no matter what he'd done. And would God really put someone among his people who would potentially be a danger to humanity? Something just wasn't right with the whole situation, but he knew he had to thread carefully with Tony. The man had a record of being a flight risk and he still cared about the man like he was family, so he didn't want to scare him into running.

Thinking it over Gibbs started to wonder how much of DiNozzo's record was actually true. His family records were most likely fabricated, but he knew for a fact that his work background was real. So whatever the other man was, he was also a first class cop who had a tendency to care more than was good for him, he neglected his own wellbeing in favor of getting justice for the victims and had never neglected to watch his partner's back.

Hearing footsteps approaching the stairs, he looked at the clock and realized that it was already ten o'clock. As the other man reached the doorway, Gibbs was frustrated to note that he didn't have his sling on, but he decided to wait until after breakfast to deal with the issue.

"Morning." Tony greeted as he came into the kitchen and sat down at the table. "Shouldn't you be at work?" He wondered with a frown.

"Morning. Figured I'd take the day off and stay with you today." Gibbs answered as he plated the pancakes and bacon strips he'd fried earlier.

"Like I need a babysitter." Tony muttered as he poured himself a glass of the juice from the carton the other man had put on the table before.

"How're you feeling?" Gibbs asked, ignoring the muttered words.

"Fine." Tony answered shortly as the other man set a plate in front of him and the two men settled to eat breakfast. Neither man really knew what to say so they ate in silence while Gibbs seemed engrossed in the morning paper.

Tony spent most of the breakfast stealing glances at the other man and trying to decipher what he was thinking. Finally he couldn't take it anymore and had to bring up the giant elephant in the room.

"Okay, I know I kinda sprung the whole angel thing on you last night, but I need to know if I still have a job."

Gibbs looked up at the other man and regarded him long enough to make him squirm in his seat.

"I have never questioned your ability to do your job and this hasn't changed that. I still trust you to have my back in the field and I hope you trust me to have yours. I do still have so questions though, if you're up to answering them."

Tony visibly relaxed at the assurance that everything was fine. "That's what I expected. Shoot."

"I will, right after we get your sling and strap it back on."

Tony grimaced at the word, but followed the other man to the quest room. Once the sling was back on and Gibbs made sure Tony had taken his painkillers, the two made their way into the living room. Not really sure how to proceed, Tony took a seat on the couch and tried to get comfortable as the other man sat down in the big armchair.

"So, I know you can heal, but what else can you do? And are you okay now? It seemed to really take it out of you to heal my cut." Gibbs asked as he looked at the other man, concern leaking into his tone.

"Like I said, it's just one of the drawbacks of my 'fallen' status. I can't really heal completely, I just speed up the healing process a bit and even that takes all my energy and most of the time it hurts like hell. Other than that, I have bit of an empathic tendencies, I feel the pain of other people like it's my own." There was a haunted look in Tony's eyes as he said the last part, so Gibbs decided to move on from the subject.

"So you can heal others, but what about yourself? You can obviously get hurt, but what about-" For the first time in a long while Gibbs had trouble figuring out how to finish the sentence, but luckily Tony took pity on him.

"You want to know if I need to be decapitated to die or if there needs to be stakes or silver involved." At the glare Tony couldn't help but grin a bit. The conversation was far from normal, but the other man's reactions assured him that things still were normal between them. His grin turned to a frown as he tried to come up with a good explanation.

"The thing is... I'm not sure. " At the other man's frustrated look at the non answer Tony hastened to explain. "I mean, I haven't died yet so not sure how it works. I've come close, but that kinda doesn't count. I asked my friend about that, but different sources offer different views on the subjects. Most describe fallen angels as being human with human weaknesses and who can die like everyone else. There are a few theories that say that being trapped on earth is an eternal punishment and others say that dying and ending up in damnation is part of the punishment. Some say falling is just a trial that determines if an angel is worthy of claiming their wings back. "

Gibbs could see a glimmer of hope in Tony's eyes as he talked about the possibility of gaining back his wings, which made it obvious which theory he wanted to believe. The thought of the younger man ending up forever condemned to either be stuck living a life as a fallen angel or ending up in hell was disturbing and he didn't want to believe in those scenarios either.

"So.. how does one become a fallen angel?" Gibbs ventured as casually as he could. He saw the other man tense and silently cursed himself for pushing as the younger man stood up and paced the length of the room.

"You know I've been asking myself the same question over and over again." Tony answered and it was impossible not to detect the anguish in his voice. "I don't know. I don't remember any of it, though I've had nightmares. Just glimpses of something, but nothing I can grasp." He collapsed back onto the sofa and buried his face in his hands.

There was a long silence as Gibbs mulled the statement over in his head. He saw from the hunch in the other man's shoulders and his expression that this was a hard subject for him. He wanted to offer some kind of consolation to the other man, but what was there for him to say? He wasn't good with offering physical comfort. Deciding to take the easy way out, he steered back to a safer subject.

"So this Henry guy knows about you. Does anyone else?" Gibbs asked in an even voice.

Tony was grateful for a question he actually had an answer for. He was feeling a bit freaked that Gibbs was taking it all so well, but he should have known that the man never lost composer.

"Well it's not like a advertise it so no. I mean can you imagine what Kate would say if she knew? Fallen angel is kinda a poster boy for the ultimate sin so can't imagine her working with me if she found out. Ducky saw the scars yesterday but I think he figures they're from abuse or something like that and who knows what Abby thinks. So no-one knows expect Henry, and now you. "

The mentioning of Abby made Gibbs think of something he'd heard the goth say about Tony. "Don't think Abby could suspect anything like this, but I've heard her wonder how your hugs always seem so warm and make her feel better. I think she would be more excited about the news than anything." He didn't say that he felt the same through the headslaps. He watched as the younger man couldn't help but smile fondly at the way his friend had described his hugs..

"Abby is great, she always tells me I have the best hugs. I've wanted to tell her since I know she would accept it but- I just couldn't. " Tony had thought about telling the goth, but always a voice in his head told him that no good could come of it. He was sure the woman would be more than nice about it and might even be helpful to have on his side, but there was a nagging concern in his mind that whispered what ifs in his ear and made him doubtful. Those same voices had made him not confide in Gibbs either, but the events of the previous night had kinda forced his hand.

Thinking of last night, something didn't feel right to him. "Mind if I ask you something?" he ventured in contemplation.

"Sure." Gibbs answered wondering what the other man wanted to ask him.

"What exactly did you see last night?" The question caught Gibbs off guard and he took a moment to really think about what he witnessed the previous night in the guest bathroom.

"I came in to see you standing in front of the mirror and then you started to shake uncontrollably. Before I had a chance to do anything, there was a flash of something and two dark shapes came out of your back like big wings with feathers. I didn't know you had wings." The last part was more of a wondering rather than a simple statement and it was clear he expected a response to it.

"Wow. I mean, I don't have wings. That's kinda fallen angel 101, once you get kicked out, you lose your wings. I have no ideas how you could have seen them, or why it felt like someone was pushing them out of my back." Tony rubbed a hand down his face as he tried to make sense of everything that had happened.

Nothing seemed to make sense anymore, he'd had a long time to come to terms with his life and now everything he thought he knew had been turned upside down.

"What about this Henry guy? Would he know anything about what happened?" Gibbs ventured

"I guess I could try and get in touch with him and see if he has any idea what's happening. I haven't heard from him in more than a decade, but I'm sure I can track him down somehow." Gibbs nodded his agreement.

"Maybe we could ask Abby for help." before Tony could protest he continued. "I don't mean telling her everything, though you know that wouldn't be the worst idea. We could ask her to do a search and see if she could find him She'll wonder why and pester you for information, but she'll understand it in the end if you tell her that you can't explain. "

Tony wasn't sure if he wanted to include the goth in this, but on the other hand he knew that having her do the search would increase their chances of finding the man.

"I'll think about it okay? I'll call a contact of mine first and if he doesn't have any information on him then maybe I'll ask Abby for help." Not really satisfied with Tony's decision but not willing to start a fight about it, Gibbs nodded his head and let the subject drop.

There was silence for a long while as both men were deep in thought. Tony wasn't sure what to say or do next and it seemed that he wasn't alone with the dilemma. Finally deciding to break the silence he carefully stretched and stood up. "Mind if I go for a short walk?" before the other man could respond he continued. "Yeah I know, I'll take it easy. Just think I could use some fresh air."

Deciding that he didn't mind a moment alone either, Gibbs nodded his head in agreement. "Just don't overdo it. I'll be down with the boat if you need anything."

"Yeah, thanks." Tony said as he stood up and went to get his cell and wallet and to put on his shoes. Luckily it was warm enough that he didn't need to bother with a jacket.

Tony hadn't spent much time at Gibbs' place so he didn't really know the best walking routes, but he figured he could just circle the block a few times or head down one of the streets and check out the neighborhood. He had a recollection of his boss mentioning that there was some kind of park nearby somewhere.

He hated that he'd lied to Gibbs about having a contact who might have information about Henry, but he had to come up with something so that the other man wouldn't press the issue of asking their goth lab tech for help.

Telling his secret to anyone had never been part of the plan and involving more people into his mess was not an option he was willing to consider. And though he'd said he could ask his old friend for more information, he wasn't really sure if that was an option either.

As he saw a sign that told him the park was only few blocks ahead, he decided to head there and kept walking towards it.

He thought about the reason he didn't want to dig further into the meaning of recent events.

The truth of the matter was that he was afraid. Things felt like they were changing and he didn't understand it. He knew that it wasn't exactly brave to hide his head in the bushes and hope for whatever this was to pass, but he wasn't sure he could face whatever the alternative might be. He'd always been so careful not to get his hopes up, but now he realized that he wasn't ready to give up what little hope he'd been harboring all these years.

As he circled the park his shoulder and ribs were starting to throb so he sat down on one of the benches. He watched people passing by and he couldn't help but smile as he watched the children who were playing on the little playground.

Being a fallen angel in itself was bad enough, but so far he'd been able to make living tolerable. He knew he'd lost so much and he wasn't sure what life had in store for him, but he'd been able to handle that. He'd gotten by so far. Now things were changing, what if he found answers now that told him just why he'd fallen and what was to become of him in the end?

He'd dedicated his time on earth to fighting bad guys, how could he handle definitely knowing that he himself was worse than all the scum he'd helped clean off the streets? It was his worst fear.

How could he face Gibbs and the rest of his friends? How could they face him if they ever found out?

Deciding that he needed to move as the thoughts felt like they were suffocating him, he got up and after walking around for another half a mile, headed back to Gibbs' place. Letting out a deep breath Tony shook his head to clear his jumbled thoughts. It would have been useful if there had been an orientation to explain everything when he fell, it would have made all of this a lot less confusing.

Maybe he should try to call in some favors to try and find Henry. He hadn't heard from the man for over a decade. Henry had been the first person he considered a friend. Then out of nowhere he'd told Tony he would have to leave for a while and gave no contact information before vanishing, after that Tony found his calling and left to pursue his passion of helping people by enrolling into the police academy. Their ways had parted and never connected again. It wasn't like he could really afford to bury his head in the sand, so in the end what other choice did he have than to try and find answers?

Now he just needed to find someone who might know something about his long lost friend.

But first he had to get back to Gibbs' place and find some aspirin. All the emotional turmoil had given him a headache. After that he'd make some calls.

TBC...

_**A/N: I know it's late, sorry for taking so long with this chapter. I was supposed to post yesterday but I just couldn't make the end of this chapter to work. Still not the way I'd like it but it's better than it was. I'll do my best to get the next chapter done as soon as I can, but not making any promises about when it's going to be posted. I've learned not to make promises I'm not sure I can keep :) Thanks for reading this chapter, reviews are love as always ;)**_


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